Tag: middle school

Weekend Notes

It was a pretty boring weekend in our house. There were no games or practices. No parental social events. Nothing at all on the calendar.

C talked S into taking her to Ikea to get her birthday present a little early – a new desk set – so we spent Saturday afternoon putting that together and rearranging her room. As always, assembling Ikea furniture was maddening at times. The final result looked good, though, and C was pleased.

L got inspired and asked to move her computer desk from the bonus room into her bedroom. I told her she should just wait a few months until M leaves and make M’s room a computer room. She already plans on taking over M’s bathroom the minute she leaves. She didn’t like my idea, though, so we moved a few things around and her gaming rig is now probably way too close to her bed.


With nothing else really going on, I’ll use this Monday post as a chance to catch up on everything going on with M, as it is SENIOR SZN. Do the kids still say szn?

Friday she sent S and I an excited text that said “I’m a cum laude!” A few years back CHS went to the model where the top 15 percent of the graduating class get slotted into summa, magna, and cum laude honors groups. She had been telling us all year she wouldn’t make it because, “There are so many smart people in my class. I would have made it easily last year, but not this year.”

Damn, throwing some shade at the class of 2022.

My immediate response was:

She was not as amused by that as I was.

Anyway, about ten minutes later she sent another message: “Wait, I didn’t get it.”

The reason for the confusion was kind of fucked up.

The school office called all the seniors who earned honors over the PA in groups. For some reason the principal decided to call an extra ten kids, in between two of the other groups. M was in that extra group. When they got to the office the principal told them that they were all 0.002 GPA points short of making the cut, but she was still super proud of them and wanted them to know they were as valued as the kids who make it.

M was PISSED. The rest of the day she had to either correct people who congratulated her, or, after the official photo of the honors grads got posted and she wasn’t in it, answer questions as to why she was absent.

I get her frustration. You either don’t call those kids to the office over the intercom – have their counselors send them a message that they were close – or round up those 0.002 points and include them. Seems like kind of a shitty thing to do to announce them to the entire school just to tell them, “Sorry, you were soooo close…” She said she spent the day thinking “If only I had taken one more honors class,” or about an A- she got freshman year.

I thought about how since final grades aren’t in yet, how do we know that any of these 10 extra kids won’t end up with a better GPA than some of the kids who got selected ahead of them? Seniors don’t have to take spring finals, but there are still three weeks of classes and plenty of time to wiggle the final GPAs a bit. I guess there has to be a cutoff date, and that will always be before final grades are in.

S told her that no one really gives a shit If you were in the top 15 or 16% of your class. While the extra colors would have been nice on graduation day, M shouldn’t let it bother her once she woke up Saturday morning.

I get that the intent behind including these kids, but I’m not sure the administrators thought it through very well.

Prom is this coming weekend. I’m pretty sure there has already been way more drama around M’s group than last year. There’s some girl drama; one lady in the group has been kind of a wank for a few months and that has caused some problems. Then there has been drama about pre- and post-prom parties, and M’s friend group not all getting invited to the same gatherings.

Making matters worse, Saturday looks like it will be cold and rainy. So M is already stressing about how her hair will look, where we will be able to take pictures, etc.

Weight of the world and whatnot.

We got the invitations for her two grad parties sent out. We are doing a family/friends event at our house on Memorial Day, then she and her two friends are doing a bigger party together in June.

Saturday night, as S and I were winding down, we came to the conclusion that while the college years are certainly going to be expensive, no one warns you how costly the finals weeks of your senior’s high school days will be. Prom, baccalaureate, graduation, graduation parties, then the prep for going off to college. It ain’t going to be a cheap summer for us.

Oh, M informed us last week that she was going to need several dresses because she has so many grad parties to attend. We both laughed and reminded her that she has a job; if she needs more than one dress she can buy the others on her own. She thought we were being incredibly unfair by suggesting that. I kind of enjoy the moments when a kid who is very smart and pretty mature says really dumb stuff. It reminds me she’s still an idiot kid at times.


She is not our only graduating child. L has been bugging us for awhile to host a pool party on her last day of eighth grade. I was very much against this. Even though she has a tiny class – only 28 kids – I didn’t want to deal with all of them. Especially since the last day of school is a Friday and S would be at work.

I asked L if we could just do the girls but she said no, she wanted the entire class.

Then I realized her last day of class is the Friday of Memorial Day weekend, so a lot of people would probably be leaving town that night. I asked around among friends who have lake houses and, yep, they were all leaving Friday night.

S is home on Thursdays. M will have graduated and can help. S suggested we do it that day. Since it was now two against one I had no choice but to go along with that plan.

I sent the invitation out Sunday. I’m sure it will be fine. Although I wouldn’t mind if it stormed and we had to cancel. That makes me a terrible person/parent, doesn’t it?

S has also been trying to get L into dresses for her spring events. Eighth grade Mother’s Day Mass, graduation, and then M’s stuff. L is actually into cute clothes these days, but she hates to go shopping, so it’s been a struggle to find enough clothes for the next six weeks of activities.

Kid Stuff

Today is a strange day in our house. M and C wrapped up finals on Friday, so (as I begin this in the morning) both are still in a deep sleep. Hell, C probably finally went to bed somewhere in the 2–3 AM range.

L, on the other hand, has class through Wednesday. So the two of us were up at the normal time.

That feels weird because it’s the first time we’ve had a schedule like this. Last year, of course, both schools were locked down and the girls were e-learning for the final month of the semester. Two years ago I’m 95% sure M’s last day of finals coincided with the last day of the year for St P’s. I picked her up at noon, we went to lunch to celebrate the end of her first semester of high school, then I picked her sisters up an hour or so later.

Not sure L is super happy with how this works out for her. Although she goes back two days after the high schoolers in January, so it evens out.

Seems like finals went well for both high schoolers. M complained about how the finals schedule this year. Instead of having two finals a day for four days, they had three finals the first two days, then two on Friday. So they had pretty normal days those first two days, starting at 9:00 and finishing at 2:30. So told me how that was so unfair compared to the old system. I rolled my eyes and ignored her complaints.


We signed C up for the written portion of driver’s ed on Friday. I’m hoping she gets a lot of work done over the break and can knock out her 30 hours of “class time” quickly. We haven’t got her in a car in the high school parking lot, yet. But that is coming soon.


Two more weeks of basketball in the books for L’s team. They’ve split games each weekend.

Last week they lost game one of the day by five. That was a bummer because they led by six pretty much the entire game. The other team threw a half-court trap at us to start the fourth quarter and we gave up the lead in about four possessions and never got it back.

The true highlight of that game, though, was one of the refs. First, he called the game like a first grade game, stopping to explain every call to the players, giving them visual demonstrations of what they did wrong. This got tedious quick.

Worse, he also enjoyed lecturing the coaches and parents about his calls. If there was any complaining, he would stretch these lectures out for a good 30 seconds, speaking loud enough for all to hear. He was in control of the gym. Or at least giving that appearance.

Example: “Ladies, you can reach as much as you want, but if you displace the player you’re guarding, that’s a foul.” He would wave his arms around to give a visual of how you can reach as he spoke. “Until the offensive player is displaced, it’s a legal defensive play.”

The displacement thing became very important. Both coaches complained that their girls were getting hacked. But, as he said, as long as you don’t displace the girl with the ball, you can hack the hell out of her and he won’t call it.

Sadly it was our coaches who lost their patience the most with him, and there were a couple lengthy, and uncomfortable, “conversations.” The word displacement was thrown around a lot. Eventually even parents were sarcastically yelling “Displacement!” from the stands any time there was contact on the floor. Our assistant coach asked the ref, loudly, if he was proud of himself.

None of that was necessary. Refs can explain calls to coaches during breaks in play, quietly. There’s no need to carry on for everyone in the gym to hear.

Thanks to all his pontificating – plus the other team shooting about 25 free throws – the game took 90 minutes to play. Which is just ridiculous. More so since we played immediately afterward. On the same court. With the same refs. Sigh…

Fortunately we got matched up with a team we had crushed in week one. We crushed them again. L and a girl almost got into it. They ran into each other once and L got the best of it. Then they were fighting for a ball and both refused to back down, even after the refs called a jump ball. This other girl was a little rougher than L, and the second time they tangled a friend of mine said, “I think she is going to look for L after the game and try to kick her ass!” I laughed, but made sure that girl left first just in case!

I think the score not being close and the refs realizing we were starting the game about the time it should have ended forced Mr. Talker to blow his whistle less often. Although one of our coaches yelled “Displacement!” at his partner when she let the defense shove one of our girls without a call.

L’s team is in what is supposed to be in a seventh grade league. The team they played first yesterday had girls that looked like they belonged in high school. And they were good. Really good. We heard after the game they hadn’t lost a game since third grade. It showed. They were better everywhere on the court and smoked us by 30.

Sadly, again, the highlight was our coaches losing it with one of the refs. Our head coach got a warning then two technicals and an ejection for complaining that the other team was grabbing our guards when they tried to run the offense. Which they were. Also the fouls were 8–2 against us in the second half despite our girls being totally checked out while they were getting mauled on the other end. Still, never a good look for a coach to get tossed.

Guess what? Once again we had the same court, same refs for game two. This time our opponents looked like fifth graders. So we beat them by 30. An even-Stephen day. There were no referee issues.

L played ok in all the games. I think she scored six total points last week. She had two in the first game yesterday, then six in the second. Which came despite her barely being able to run thanks to her knee issues. They subbed her out more than they have in any game this season since she could barely walk at times. I was worried about her when she scored the first bucket of the game then immediately went to the bench. But she came back in early in the second quarter, hit a 15-foot jumper, and flexed as she ran up court. OK, then.

She has been frustrated because she’s not scoring much. She was really down after the games last week because two girls who almost never score both dropped 10+ in the second game. The two girls who lead the team in scoring also do it by being very aggressive and taking super-unorthodox shots. One girl just kind of heaves it from her hip, yet she’s probably averaging 10–12 a game. L is always trying to set herself up to take a perfect shot.

I told her as a point guard, it isn’t her primary job to score. She’s supposed to set up others to score. But, I made clear, she turned down some scoring chances. A couple times she had wide-open paths to the bucket that she passed out of. The mom who has coached her for years was sitting beside me and even yelled at her a couple times, “L, what are you doing?!?! Take that shot!”

I added that it’s not being selfish if she has a good, open chance to score and takes it. And, as the best dribbler on the team, she needs to take advantage if she can take two dribbles and get in the lane instead of someone else taking a guarded jumper from the perimeter.

She did better than that in the second game yesterday. Even though that team was awful, I give her credit since she was moving at about half speed. She got to the baseline several times and had three runners spin out. She was aggressive. She made some good passes. I also reminded her that as she gets older, the game changes. Forget her knee issues. At this age, the games aren’t just about being faster down the court than the defense. It’s great when she can get out on the break. But she has to learn to run and play within an offense. Learning to be patient and run the plays how the coach wants them run will pay off one day.

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