To the basketball team of my alma mater.

In the future, if you plan on losing a weeknight game that begins at 9:00 PM my time, please do so in regulation rather than taking two overtimes to do so. I’m not as young as I used to be, and now I’ve got a kid. Who is teething. It’s not in the interest of my health to be awake until 1:30 rethinking every play. Your assistance is much appreciated.


Your Pal,