Please examine this picture.

One the left you see an open box of Multi Grain Cheerios. It is nearly empty, but there is still a half-serving, give or take, left inside. Enough to start a bowl, fill a coffee cup,1 or be the perfect portion if you’re slicing a banana to go with.

On the right you see the brand new box of Multi Grain Cheerios that I purchased yesterday. Not only did someone open it when there was already a box open, but they also opened it from the bottom, which means we can’t close it properly. And they failed to roll the inner liner closed to keep the cereal fresh. To top it off, they dumped probably half a bowl of the Cheerios into the sink, which they left to adhere to the stainless steel as their milk evaporated overnight.

This, my friends, is what I came downstairs to this morning. This, my friends, is why I’m in favor of schools reopening.

Sure, this shit can still happen when the girls have to get out the door by 7:10 AM. But then I can call them directly on it. Or, if I don’t notice until I return from dropping them off, I can seethe about it for awhile and then forget it.

Now, with them at home, I just want to charge upstairs, wake them all up, and yell, “Which one of you idiots opened the fucking Cheerios from the wrong end?”

Schools reopening is not just about kids’ mental health. Us parents who have been with them every day for nearly five months need a break, too. Even if it’s just for a couple weeks before the schools shut down and we have to figure out eLearning again.


1. This is how I practice portion control with cereal: eat from a normal-sized coffee cup. Throw in a banana or an English muffin and you have a healthy breakfast without eating 900 calories because you had a massive bowl of Honey Bunches of Oats.