Tag: TV (Page 16 of 17)

Amazing!

I’m glad I’m not the only one who thinks that Jesse Palmer uses the word amazing far too often. “What an amazing view, huh?” “You look amazing!” “It’s been an amazing day, hasn’t it?” And that was just with one woman! I think he’s just been watching too much Queer Eye to get his Metrosexual cred in order.

Long time Friend of the Blog Dale S. came up with the genius idea of a Jesse Palmer drinking game. Simple rules: every time he uses the word amazing, take a drink. Like the Century Club, it seems far too simple to have any effect. In practice, though, after an hour, you’ll be nicely toasted. I’ll add one bonus rule: each time Jesse tells a woman he is falling in love with her, but also falling in love with someone else, you have to slam whatever is left in your can/mug/flask. Should make a show that reached new lows of insulting our intelligence last night a little more fun. Props to Dale!

 

Dumb

Now I remember why I didn’t watch American Idol for the first two seasons. Tonight was sheer lunacy. The two best singers, by far, get the least votes. The most consistent performer of the competition gets the heave ho. Stupid. Idiotic. Borderline criminal. The only saving grace was the last note LaToya belted out during her goodbye song was better than anything the other three contestants will sing in the remaining weeks, so I don’t have to watch any more episodes this year. Plus, she can sign her record contract sooner. Go get yours, LaToya! An extra special thanks to Fox for finding new and exciting ways to stretch what should be a 30 minute show at most into 65 minutes.
I think I need to boil myself to get rid of this reality TV stench.

 

American Idol

First a note about comments. It was pointed out to me that you’re asked to register. I guess that’s ok; it’s fee and then the system remembers who you are, tracks all your comments, etc. But you can just as easily select the Anonymous option and include your name in your post. So don’t let that registering option scare you away from sharing your thoughts.

A couple of people have asked me for my thoughts on American Idol. Silly me, I was contemplating finally finishing up my Rwanda post, or some discussion on the events in Iraq. I keep forgetting about the “Important” issues! My bad.

OK, last night was Disco Night, featuring guest judge Donna Summer. Why do they call them judges if they’re not voting, just commenting? Anyway, props to Donna for actually being mildly critical of a couple performances. There’s nothing better than bringing Gloria Estefan, or some other hack singer on to basically promote their tired, washed up careers for an hour then they say nothing more striking than “I love your dress!” when it’s time for them to provide input. Come on, you had some measure of success in the music industry. You don’t need to rip these kids apart, but at least give them some honest, critical feedback that will help them improve their performances.

Jasmine Trias: Gone. Unless the dam breaking after her second song generates enough sympathy votes to save her. For someone who showed so much promise early, she’s really crumbled recently. It’s been at least four weeks since she performed a song well from start to finish. I even turned away during “It’s Raining Men” I was so disillusioned with her performance. Jennifer Hudson really should be here in her place.

Diana DeGarmo. She continues to be a total enigma to me. She sounds like someone you’d go see at a state fair (commenting on the looks of a 16 year old just isn’t fair, so I’ll leave that one alone). There isn’t an ounce of subtlety in her performances. In the middle of every song she sounds like she’s going to bust into some country tune. Listen, she’s got a decent enough voice, and in ten years when she learns how to control it, she might become a fine singer. But if she’s in the final, something is very wrong. My conspiracy theory on why Simon pimps her so much is that he’s pushing Fantasia and LaToya to stretch themselves in the final weeks.

Fantasia Barrino. “I’m Holding Out for a Hero” is disco? Here’s an idea: how about an all Footloose week? I liked the way she mixed it up a little, but agreed with all the judges who questioned the song choice. Gave her typical performance, full of uniqueness and flair. “Knock on Wood” was well done, but not a show stopper. Safe for another week.

LaToya London. I started loving LaToya when she performed one of my all time favorite R&B songs, Rufus and Chaka Khan’s “Ain’t Nobody”. While her first song last night was ok, she just shredded Thelma Houston’s classic “Don’t Leave Me This Way”, probably my favorite disco song ever. An absolutely awesome performance (in my unbiased opinion). Cruising to the final.

After 500 words on American Idol, and my excitement about seeing the Trish thing play out on The Bachelor tonight, I will be taking at least 20 showers today in a feeble effort to cleanse myself.

 

TV

It’s been a busy TV week. Let’s jump right in.

American Idol. I didn’t watch Tuesday’s show, but I can’t say I’m disappointed George Huff got the boot. He’s got a tremendous voice, but he’s a one trick pony. For about the first four weeks, you think, “This guy is awesome!” After that, though, you realize he sings every song exactly the same way. Good guy, nice singer, but not finalist material. I’m troubled by the teens. I didn’t like anything about Diana DeGarmo at the beginning. I thought she was a screamer, a glorified high school talent show act, and was perpetually annoyed by her insistence on starting each song with an exhortation to the audience, “Come on y’all!” Jasmine Trias, on the other hand, was my dark horse to win it all. Little and young, but with a big voice that was properly restrained, I thought she had the right combination of goods to sneak into the finals then get an upset win. Over the last three weeks, however, something weird has happened. I haven’t hated Diana’s performances. It seems like she’s picked up some of Jasmine’s restraint. As a visual performer, I still have issues with her overselling the songs, but I can’t deny she’s been singing much better recently. Jasmine, on the other hand, has had cracks in her smooth veneer show. She’s chosen some songs that just don’t fit her voice. She’s seemed nervous at times. She’s lacked the effortless quality she had early on. Not that it matters, it’s all about LaToya and Fantasia anyway.

The Bachelor. All right, any doubt that Trish is an ABC plant now? Seriously, they’re letting her come back next week and walk in during Jesse’s dinner with someone else? Just ABC trying to force some drama into a tired concept. My official handicapping is as follows:
Jessica B: 2-1. Gorgeous, smart, grounded, and seems to be taking everything in stride. She didn’t ask Jesse “Will you love me?” she asked him, “Are you open to something happening?” This girl understands the game and isn’t going on about falling for someone she barely knows. At least not yet. I like her family’s healthy skepticism as well. She also seemed to remain largely silent when the other girls were being openly catty about Trish.
Tara: 8-1. Would be higher, but I think her psycho dad seriously impacts her chances. The middle class buyer’s version of Jessica. She’s got a lot going on for her; she’s just not the luxury model. Too much of an instigator in the anti-Trish conversations.
Trish: 10-1. Hey, she’s hot and she knows how to work it. You can’t completely rule her out. Especially when all of ABC is pushing to get her into the final week. I think my favorite moment of this week’s episode was when she was talking privately with her sister about all the drama she faces from the other girls. The unstated message I picked up was “Sister, you don’t understand what it’s like. You’re not filthy and hot, you don’t sleep with married men (allegedly) and you haven’t lost track of how many people you’ve slept with.” A touching moment between two sisters.
Mandy J: 20-1. I’m sure she’s a good person but the beauty pageant stuff is just too weird. Especially when that’s all her family can talk about! I’m sure it’s difficult to have a normal conversation with someone courting your daughter with cameras in your face. But that was ridiculous.

I feel dirtier about writing almost 600 words on reality TV (Another sure sign we’ll be walking the minivan lots in 2 ½ years when it’s time to turn in S’s Passat) than I did paying to download music, so let’s move on to Friends. I thought the final episode was quite good. Nobody could have been fooled with how it ended, so there was no real drama in getting there. But they also didn’t try to do anything the show hasn’t done for ten years, which was nice. It was enjoyable, I laughed, and I didn’t wonder what I thought about it after the final credits rolled (See, 1998, Seinfeld). I think Friends was a vastly overrated show. I watch reruns quite often, and have mostly enjoyed the show over its run, but to say it’s one of the top ten comedies of all time would be a lie. It got attention for creating six funny characters, lasting for so long, and for being the first show about our generation as adults. It was better than 98% of the comedies, but never in the class of Seinfeld, MASH, Cheers, etc. Joey Tribiani will always make me laugh, but let’s not kid ourselves, he was no George Costanza. It’s a little disappointing that Fraser is going out with such a comparative whimper, as it was a much better show over its 11 years, even if its ratings have fallen from the top five slot it claimed for so many years. Friends was a nice show with memorable characters that made you laugh more often than not, but the biggest disappointment about it ending is there will now be one less decent show on network TV. I would put the odds of Joey enjoying the success Fraser had after Cheers ended just on this side of me ever buying my daughter a Missouri cheerleading outfit.

ER. I don’t want to speak for the other prospective parents out there, but I’ll just share that in this household, watching the dramatization of a woman miscarry her seven month fetus wasn’t exactly the most popular ER plot development ever. Fortunately, when I leaned over during a commercial and told the Little Girlfriend she needs to stay in for at least 10 more weeks and make sure she doesn’t get tangled in the umbilical cord, she responded with an immediate and resounding kick. Good to know she’s already paying attention to Big Poppa.

 

 

Pregnant Conversations – American Idol

Scene: Interior, couple sitting on couch drinking coffee in the morning.

Wife: How did you sleep?
Husband: Pretty good, you?
Wife: Good, Little Girlfriend had to wake up early and play, though.
Husband (Leaning over and speaking to wife’s stomach): Your daddy doesn’t like to wake up in the morning. We can work on that once you’re born, ok?

This kid is moving around like crazy. Last night, I noticed S’s shirt jumping. I put my hand on her stomach and felt something move from one side of my hand to the other, a foot or a hand, with some serious determination. I could push gently in that area and feel body parts shifting. A couple weeks ago, the movement was cool: it was little jumps and bumps. Now, it’s kind of like walking in murky water: you feel movement that is intelligent rather than random. You know there’s something down there moving around, but you can’t see when or where the next movement is going to be. Last night was the first time I got freaked out a little by it. S. has felt her flip several times a day. She’s freaked out thinking, “I have 15 more weeks of this, with a bigger kid each day and less room? How am I going to breathe?”

I’ve always been quite proud of the fact for the most part I’ve avoided the reality TV craze. I’ve never watched an episode of Survivor. I didn’t watch the Apprentice. And until this year, I hadn’t watched American Idol beyond the initial episodes when all the random schmoes were on. This year, for whatever reason, like the rest of America, we’ve fallen in love with the competition! (How’s that for a Ryan Seacrest line?) Anyway, last night was a clear example of why I’ve not watched the show in the past. The three women who were by far the best singers; I mean it’s not even close; were the three lowest vote getters. I had no doubts they would be the final three competitors, and all were worthy of getting record contracts. Yet the idiots who called in deemed them least worthy to continue. Seriously, that red headed kid should have been booted a month ago, what’s wrong with this country? He’s a nice kid, and once he grows up, gets his heart broken a couple times, and understands the meaning of the songs he’s singing, he might be a fine lounge singer somewhere. But for now, he’s thoroughly awful each week. We can’t even look at the TV when he’s singing. The 16 year old girl who just screams (Diana?) wouldn’t win a bad high school talent contest, yet she’s still in it. If La Toya London had somehow got the boot last night, I would suggest everyone take their asses to church today because the end is near.

Then again, if I’m eating at Jack’s Stack and watching American Idol, that alone might be enough evidence that the end is near.

Yes, La Toya is my pick. Ever since I heard her sing Rufus and Chaka Khan’s “Ain’t Nobody” – one of the great R&B songs ever – and sing it well, I’ve been in love with her.

 

A Shining Angel In Times Of Darkness

There are times when I doubt the world, when I think it’s full of cynicism and selfishness. Moments when I believe people are more concerned with getting ahead than the common good. Then there’s a moment like last night, when my faith in man is reaffirmed. Yes, I subjected myself to ten minutes of Jay Leno so I could watch Vince Vaughn in action. The man is a Golden God, to quote his friend Will Ferrell. He’s a beacon in troubled times. He gives me a reason to wake up in the morning.

I’ll spare you all the details, but suffice it to say that the Tonight Show hasn’t been this interesting since Johnny exited the scene a decade ago. What truly made the night was Vince’s (obligatory, of course) recounting of a recent trip to Las Vegas. After admitting he enjoys gambling, but isn’t so good at the card games, he replayed his stay at the Paris Las Vegas hotel. As anyone who’s been there knows, the hotel is designed to replicate the Paris, France experience. Signs are in French, there’s French music, lots of mimes, cheese and cigarettes. The Germans march in everyday at noon and people flee in hysterics before them. Also, everyone who works there has some standard French phrases to greet guests with. Vaughn mentioned how he really enjoyed “Bob from Brooklyn” greeting him with “Bonsiour” or “Bonjour”. In fact he enjoyed it so much, he’d often make laps of the hotel telling all the workers “Hello” so he could hear their cheery French responses. (Here it comes) So, as he finished, (Here it is):

“While I was losing in cards, I was winning in fun, Jay.”

Pure brilliance. I laughed my ass off. Those of us who are fans of Mr. Vaughn know that Trent Walker wasn’t a huge stretch for him. This was just another sign that Vince is, as always, the fun-loving, out-going, party guy. I flipped back once later, when Molly Shannon was on, and Vince was the perfect guest on the couch. As soon as she somewhat awkwardly ended a story, he clapped as enthusiastically as a man could clap to lead the audience in appreciation of her effort (never mind Leno audiences clap like mindless, Pavlovian dogs each time the applause light comes on). He leaned over, patted Shannon on her leg, and softly said something to reassure her. All the man needed was a drink and a cigarette and we’d be transported back to a simpler time.

For that, I think Vince Vaughn for renewing my faith in mankind.

 

Time Zones

Three days, three time zones. And I’m doing it backwards (going from Pacific to Mountain in day three) which makes the adjustment even more difficult. Is it 10:00 (physical time zone) 12:00 (home time zone) or 9:00 (where I spent the previous 24 hours)? Strange. I was in LA Monday night, today, then flew into Phoenix Tuesday. No time for fun in LA, although I did drive by Dodgers’ Stadium, the Staples Center, and the LA Coliseum on the way to the airport Tuesday afternoon.

I experienced an incredibly odd sensation Monday: my plane flew over my house. Other than when I lived in a dorm that was easily recognizable from the sky, I’ve never knowingly looked down on my home before. If I’m working in the yard and see a plane overhead, I might wonder where it’s going, who’s on it, and what their stories are. I never thought of the other perspective. Looking down, I could tell if a strange car was parked in our driveway, if the home was on fire and emergency workers were present, or just seeing it sit quietly (which is what I saw). It was a strange feeling of helplessness, because if something was going on, I not only couldn’t do a thing about it, but wouldn’t be able to until I landed in Chicago 50 minutes later.

The roads of Arizona are full of snow birds and spring training fans. Today on the drive from Phoenix to Prescott, I saw license plates from three Canadian provinces, Indiana, Iowa, Missouri, Texas, Michigan, and Illinois among others. Or maybe they’re just people who have moved here recently and haven’t changed their tags (like a certain well-regarded blogger from Indianapolis).

There were exactly three subjects on the radio on the drive up. The Passions of the Christ. Gay marriage. And steroids in baseball. In order, A) I doubt I’ll see the movie, but not out of any bias or anything like that. I’ve seen two movies in theaters in the last 12 months. The odds just aren’t good. I think the controversy is a little silly. It’s a movie, and one told from a very definite point of view (an extremely conservative, Catholic point of view). Don’t discount its message, but don’t consider it the final word, either. B) I’m extremely thankful that President Bush pointed out that if Bill and Gary down the street decide to get married, my marriage is a total sham. That’s good knowledge to have. Seriously, if gay couples chose to get married, it doesn’t affect my marriage any more or less than the more numerous loveless heterosexual marriages, or hetero marriages based on convenience or full of dishonesty and infidelity. Frankly, what any other couple in the world does, gay or straight, in no way affects how successful, happy, and loving my marriage is. Honestly, I respect people who come out and say, “I’m offended by gay couples” a lot more than those who hide behind political language that states a desire to “defend marriage.” At least come out and say what you mean, rather than trying to offend as few people as possible while pandering to a political base. C) I’ve not seen Jason Giambi yet, but I can’t wait to see if he’s really lost 15-20 points, or the five he claims. To be honest, I’d much rather all the attention focused on steroids be spent working on the labor/financial situation in the game. In modern times, there have always been, and will always be performance enhancing drugs. It’s too late to take away Bonds, Sosa, and McGwire’s home run numbers. It’s not too late to keep $200 million payrolls from becoming the norm.

Monster House is one of my favorite shows. It’s right up there with the World Poker Tour and Nick & Jessica (Yes, I would have been at Crown Center screaming with the 12 year olds if I knew Jessica was there). On Monday’s episode, there was a couple with a baby named Kansas. Yep, it’s been added to the list. Unisex!

For some reason, ABC Family is showing a heavily edited Office Space. The printer destruction scene was just on. By far my favorite moment in the movie. It kills me every time.

The new Nike commercial with athletes competing in different sports: brilliant.

I’m flying home tomorrow. I hope to finish Bret Easton Ellis’ Glamorama, listen to a lot of music, and maybe knock out a Listening Post entry (Like I haven’t started about 20 of those on recent flights and got nowhere).

 

Snow Day

We were having a great winter, all things considered, until last Sunday. Only one small snowstorm, no super cold weather, no ice. Right now, it’s snowing for the fourth time this week and we’re supposed to get sub-zero temps tonight. Working from home kind of eliminates the snow day option, unfortunately. It doesn’t stop my hands from turning into blocks of ice after about 3:00 when the shade covers my side of the house, though. I must say, our neighborhood looks very nice covered in a layer of the white stuff. Our subdivision decided rather than street lights, each home would have a small lamp in the yard for nighttime lighting. On a normal night, it keeps it very dark: almost too dark. But for the past week, with snow covering everything, the nights have a warm glow from the lights reflecting off the ice. It feels like a Swiss chalet. OK, that’s stretching things. Almost makes winter tolerable.

People I hate: People who drive pickups fast in the snow, especially small pickups. Listen, you’ve got no weight in the back and the roads are slick. There’s no reason to go 50 in a 35. I have four-wheel drive but still try to keep it under the speed limit when you’ve got four inches to plow through. Slow it down, Jethro.

You may recall my elaborate plans for wooing Carmel High School’s Josh McRoberts to attend KU that were ruined when he committed to Duke. Well, McRoberts spent the first month of the season on the bench while a back injury healed. He finally returned to action a couple weeks ago. Although I didn’t go to his first game back, I did watch the Carmel High School TV station’s coverage of the event. The coverage is great on a normal night. A single, shaky camera mounted among the bleachers. A super staticy video feed. And a couple high school kids in dress shirts and ties commenting on the game. Yes, I’m intensely jealous I didn’t have this kind of opportunity 15 years ago. Anyway, before the pregame introductions, the announcing team was rightly talking up the event. The opposing team was introduced, followed by the first four CHS players. Just before McRoberts’ name was called, one announcer excitedly said, “Here he comes! Here he comes!” McRoberts is introduced to a huge roar from the completely full gym. Once the applause dies down, the announcer shared his assessment; “I’ve got chills up and down my spine!” I love this kid. He perfectly summed up what it’s like to have a superstar on a high school team. I remember trekking all over KC in the winters of 1988 and 1989 to watch any and every player who was Division One material. I did again later with Tyronn Lue, Derek Hood, and, of course, the Rush brothers. There’s an innocence that comes with being a high school star. Maybe it’s the endless reservoir of opportunity in front of them. Most importantly, there’s a forgiveness factor that disappears the moment they put a college jersey on for the first time. The stars in high school are larger than life, yet regular kids too.

Speaking of high school stars, a local channel shows a slightly higher quality game of the week each Friday night. Last week, #1 Lawrence North faced #2 North Central. Two proud schools (home to Eric Montross and Jason Gardner respectively) in a key clash before district play begins. North Central features top 50 senior AJ Ratliff, who’s signed to attend IU next year. Lawrence North features super sophomore Greg Oden, who checks in at 7’ and already has a better body than KU’s David Padgett (not saying much, I realize, but the kid is 15!). Ratliff was silky smooth, and I had no idea he had 22 points by the third quarter. Maybe it’s because LN was just destroying them. Oden, who reminds me of a young Patrick Ewing, was simply amazing on offense. He absolutely attacks the rim, dunking ferociously over and over. On defense, he’s not quite as advanced. He may take it easy to avoid fouls, but he really should be more intimidating than he looked Friday. There’s already talk of him going straight to the NBA in two years. It’s scary how good he’s going to be as he gets older.

I didn’t follow the Democratic presidential candidate process much until about two weeks ago. Is there a more uncomfortable look than the look on the face of someone who’s a political giant, but in the first or second contest, is forced to drop out? Dick Gephardt had that look in Iowa. There’s nothing like spending a lifetime fighting for a particular set of values, then having a huge percentage of the voting population tell you they don’t care about that view. I’ve read about candidates who lose in the general feeling this overwhelming sense of loss and depression when the election is over. And these are people who got 40 million votes. Imagine just getting 8,000. Don’t you always go to the “We fought the good fight” card at that point?

I keep hearing this buzz that Rachel Ray is the new “it” girl on the Food Network. What are these people smoking? Giada De Laurentiis is clearly the best thing about the Food Network. In a simpler time, you’d hear a lot more about her from me. To the point where some of you would probably worry about me. In these more complicated times, I’m forced to refer to her as “the really skinny girl on the Food Network”. Check out Everyday Italian sometime and judge for yourself. I’m required to not say anything else, lest I get smacked. She doesn’t read, but she knows.

 

Back Home In Indiana

West Coast Dispatch

Tuesday evening: Odd trip. I’ve had difficulty connecting to the Internet each day, apparently I’m completely wiped out right now, so I can just sit here, watch Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer, and fire up the laptop. Speaking of Rudolph, the scene when the Elves sing to Santa, “We are Santa’s elves!” while he sits and listens strikes me as a little too fascist. Maybe it’s because the History Channel has shown nothing but Nazi documentaries all day, so that’s on the brain. The crazed look the reindeer get when first encountering Rudolph’s glowing snout is a little disconcerting as well.

We watched the Charlie Brown Christmas special last week (It’s on again later this week if you missed it). Little known fact: when I was five or six, my mom banned all Charlie Brown cartoons in our house. Did my mom have political differences with Charles Shultz? Nope. Someone she had dated long ago was involved with making the specials? Not that either. It’s because I would completely lose it anytime I watched. I think some of it had to do with how much poor Chuck got put down, both by himself and others. I was a sensitive lad and picked up on these things. It didn’t matter if it was the Great Pumpkin, the Thanksgiving special, or a Charlie Brown Christmas. I cried like a baby. The last straw was when Snoopy Come Home was on that fall. When Snoopy set out by himself, I couldn’t handle it. I sat in the corner and cried for what seemed like hours. It didn’t matter that he came home, I just kept on crying. It was probably a year before I was allowed to watch Peanuts cartoons again, and I think my mom made sure other kids were around so I was shamed into not crying.

Arizona is a strange place. On one hand, like the new south, it’s becoming more integrated, progressive, and the cities look more and more like every other city. But its maverick roots are always quite apparent. I saw one truck with a bumper sticker that said, “I’ve never seen an American flag burned at a gun show.” I’m not really sure what that means, or what one has to do with the other, but it seems representative of a certain element here. Even more interesting was a truck I was behind last night. Confederate flag flying on one side, an unknown state flag that featured the stars and bars on the other side. Confederate flag stickers plastered on the sides and tail gate. Then, for added effect, some more pointed comments were painted on the truck’s body. “Lee Surrendered but I didn’t.” A few anti-UN comments. Then, a list of various dates of importance to those on the far, far right: Ruby Ridge, Waco, etc. And this person is just driving down the streets of Tucson! Weird.

Monterey was brilliant. I woke to sounds of seals barking out on the piers. I highly recommend the Doubletree near Fisherman’s Warf and Cannery Row if you have the occasion to pass time in Monterey. $89/night rates during the week, extremely nice rooms, friendly service, warm cookies at check-in, and walking distance to many of Monterey’s most popular sites. The weather was absolutely perfect: sunny, 65, not a cloud in the sky. My meeting ended earlier than expected, so I marched up to the Monterey Bay Aquarium, dropped $17.95, and saw the penguins I’ve been watching on the Internet for months in person. Try as I might, I couldn’t coax them into jumping into the water, or running around (penguins do tricks, right?). They preferred to stand there and try to keep their eyes open. Apparently my favorite birds are quite adept and performing the trick of being drowsy. On occasion, they would change locations, which caused other penguins to snap at them in territorial dust-ups. Penguins also seem to have quite a range with their excrement. Without warning, they fire off massive blasts of semi-digested fish. It was equally gross and impressive. I would watch them for five minutes, then go check out some fish or otters or something, and then come back. Naturally, while I was away, there had been some kind of movement amongst the birds, but they were back to their drowsy ways as soon as I reappeared. Oh well, it was worth it.

If Charlie Brown made me cry, why didn’t the Island of Misfit toys? How depressing is that? Or maybe I did cry when Rudolph set out by himself after being called a misfit among misfits. This is seriously depressing. Every time Rudolph makes a friend, he loses them because of his freakish nose.

More notes while in the sky between Tucson and Chicago on Wednesday.

My first true Chicago flying experience. I’ve sat on the taxiway at O’Hare before, or in the lobby of another airport for an extra 30 minutes allowing traffic to clear before my flight departed. In fact, my first flight Sunday sat on the runway for 20 minutes before they could squeeze us into the pattern. But today was different. We were warned before we boarded that we should expect to be delayed up to an hour. So we pile on the plane, back out of the gate, and sit. No biggie, I was working on 3 ½ hours of sleep, so I grabbed a pillow, lay my head against the window, and slept for about 50 minutes. I woke to the cheery news that they had added an additional 45 minutes to our delay. Yes, there was some weather in Chicago, but the delay was primarily related to extra flights in and out of Chi-town added this time of year. Query: why add the flights if you can’t handle them, or if even a rainstorm will cause horrific backups? Just a thought. If we go the full 45 minutes, chances are I’ll miss my connection’s scheduled departure time. But it may be delayed too, and there are other flights to Indy this afternoon, so I’m not too worried. After 20 minutes, the captain breaks in to tell us we’ve been cleared. We hustle out to the runway and sit. Like many western airports, Tucson shares runways with a military base, so commercial and military traffic is staggered. We sit an additional ten minutes while eight F-16s take turns landing. Great, they’re protecting the airspace of landlocked Arizona and we’re forced to sit and wait.

Another DDB travel pet-peeve: the people who despite carefully numbered boarding groups, insist on barging in an established line in front of others. I’m quite proud of my Gold status with American, which allows me to board in Group One of each flight. I’m probably tenth in line this morning, with another ten plus people behind me in our group, and a lady comes barreling into the line three people in front of me. She’s clearly a part of Group One; she’s getting on the plane first. Why the rush? Not nearly as bad as Southwest, were people rarely have any qualms about jumping in front of 30 other people who have been waiting for an hour. We make our way onto the plane, she takes her seat, and I move to mine about five rows behind her. I get situated and notice that she’s pulling pillows out of the overhead bin space and throwing them towards seats behind her. A few land in the aisle, which she just leaves there. Is she trying to be helpful? Does she hate pillows? Is she a former flight attendant who can’t help herself? Whatever, she’s really pissing me off. A corresponding pet peeve are people who come rushing forward when exiting the plane and don’t adhere to the long established Zipper Principle. If you’re rushing to make a connection, that’s fine: let me know, ask if you can go ahead, and I’ll let you proceed. Otherwise, we’re all in the same situation. Cool your jets and let the people in front of you get off.

The space between airline seats fascinates me. I enjoy the angled glimpse of people you get. I like to check out what people are reading, working on, etc. Sometimes you hear far too much of their conversations, and the temptation becomes maddening. Other times, you can’t stop looking at the person in front of you simply because there’s nothing else to do. Today, for example, there’s a woman who vaguely resembles Alex Kingston, better known as Dr. Elizabeth Corday on ER. She falls into the “can’t stop glancing” category. She’s caught me a couple of times, but I like to think she enjoys it. Still, should I lean forward and tell her I just think she looks like an actress whose work I enjoy, I’m not stalking at 31,000 feet? She’s installing her iPod now. I’ll go ahead and stop before this gets too weird.

D’s Notes

Dumb sports announcer comment of the week: “Hard to believe” that Dick Vermeil coached in his first Monday Night Football game since 1981 this week, according to Al Michaels and Lisa Guerrero. Why is that hard to believe? He was retired from coaching for almost 20 years. The Rams weren’t expected to be good when he took them to the Super Bowl. He retired again after winning the Super Bowl. His first two years with the Chiefs, they weren’t good either. So really he’s coached five years since 1981, and until this season, he never coached a team that was viewed as interesting enough to put into the MNF lineup. Idiots.

Speaking of MNF, I was disappointed when they showed a shot of Lake Merritt that there wasn’t a reference to Gut Fest.

I vote that the greatest invention of all-time is the hard drive MP3 player. I decided to secretly allocate some funds from our wedding account a few months back (that’s a joke, I got permission to make my purchase) and while I really wanted a fancy iPod, I got a slightly larger (CD player size) Creative Labs Nomad with twice the disk space for about $150 less. After a few weeks of diligent efforts, I managed to get all the MP3s on my computer hard drive transferred as well as all the CDs I wanted to rip loaded. Now, every piece of music I own is on one easy to carry device. I can take it when I travel, or just hook it up to the speakers in my office and let it play all day. While a lot of people create special play lists, I prefer to load music by genre, hit shuffle, and let it play. I always have a hard time looking at my music collection and selecting what I want to listen to, so this is perfect for me. There’s nothing like jumping from the Beatles to the Flaming Lips to Dean Martin without any input from me.

ESPN Classic showed the Roberto Clemente edition of Sports Century twice Monday. I thought I knew the story of Roberto, but turns out I did not. I never knew that sports writers in Pittsburgh made fun of his Puerto Rican accent by writing his quotes the way they sounded, “Ever seence I been in da beeg leagues, I hup heet da ball meeny times.” Keep in mind this was in the mid-50s, so this wasn’t someone trying to be funny. It was a mean spirited way of reminding an outsider that he was different and inferior. As Sports Illustrated’s Tom Verducci pointed out, those same sports writers no doubt cleaned up quotes from many of the southern white players who spoke less than perfect English. I didn’t know that Roberto was widely considered to be a whiner and injury faker. I also didn’t realize how outspoken Roberto was about matters of race. I always thought that he was such a hero to Latin players because he was the first Latin superstar. Now I realize it was because unlike Jackie Robinson who was forced to bite his tongue, Roberto demanded respect for Latin players and was a beacon for youngsters throughout the Caribbean. When he died while attempting to help earthquake victims in Nicaragua, he cemented his status as a Latin icon.

I was really hoping our last memory of Roger Clemens would be of him head hunting Miguel Cabrera then Cabrera calmly taking him out of the park, opposite field immediately after. Still a punk, after all these years.

Speaking of Cabrera, he’s everything Carlos Beltran should be. When he steps to the plate, you know something exciting is going to happen. He has an aura that he belongs, he knows it, and he’s out to make an impact. Despite all his skills (probably more pure skills than Cabrera) Beltran often seems disinterested or distracted. He does amazing things too, but you don’t expect them to happen. I’ve just thoroughly cursed Miguel Cabrera’s career.

Pity the East Coast fan. Last night’s game ended at approximately 12:24 AM. I can’t wait for Sunday, when Indiana keeps its head firmly in the sand and forces us to wait until 8:00 for game seven to start.

I loved VH1’s “I Love the 80s”. While they it didn’t resonate the same way, I enjoyed “I Love the 70s” immensely as well. In fact, I don’t think I moved for nine hours Labor Day while watching the 70s marathon. So I think you can guess how I feel about “I Love the 80s Strikes Back”. Another ten-hour block of great television. Keeping all the breakout stars; Hal Sparks, Mo Rocca, Rachael Harris, and the pure genius of Michael Ian Black; was an inspired move. However, why are they continuing to give Rich Eisen airtime? ESPN finally ran his ass out (of course, they replaced him with some other no-talent ass clown, to use an Office Spaceism) and they pollute this tremendous program with his presence. He continues to offer the same banal, pedestrian observations. However, this time he’s sporting the unshaved look, apparently to add an edge to his commentary. What’s outstanding, though, is his attempt to bite Michael Ian Black’s style. Fortunately, he’s not nearly good enough to pull it off, so it just annoys me more. There is no Stuart Scott, which is nice.

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